夏至のパワーでしょうか。。。
神様へ捧げた詩集、Stotra Ratnavaliを久しぶりに手に取って、知っている歌をすべて歌ってみた。
しばらく歌っていなくて忘れているものもあって、反省しつつ。。。
でも特に好きでたくさん歌ったものはもちろん覚えてた。
女神に捧げた歌、Bhavani Ashtakamがそのひとつ。
Adi Shankaracharyaによって書かれた、私にはあなたしかいません、という内容の美しい詩。
「私は堕ちぶれて、ヨガも瞑想の仕方も知らないし、
タントラもマントラも、プージャも知らなきゃ、ヨガへの献身も無い。
行いも口も悪く、集中力も無く、誓いもまもれない。
神々のこともよく知りません。
口論、絶望、拒絶、狂気、
火、水、外国、
どこにいても私をお守りください。
あなたこそが私の避難所です。」
心に響いたところだけ抜き取って、ざっくばらんに訳すとこんな感じです。
これをサンスクリット語の先生に習った当時３年前は、なんて謙虚なんだ、そしてちょっと自虐的？とも思いました。
でも偉大なシャンカラチャーリヤがこう思うってことは、このくらいの謙虚さと切望をもつべきなのだな、と。
今になってこの詩を読むと、３年前よりぐっと心に響く。
たくさん自分の修行の時間が取れた当時に比べて、今。。。
だめだめですけど、どうか！みたいな内容に深く共鳴。。。
まあ今はカルマヨガの時期とも言える。母親業はこの上ない喜びに満ちた楽しいものだし、小さな女神様からいろいろ学ばせてもらいます。
न तातो न माता न बन्धुर्न दाता
न पुत्रो न पुत्री न भृत्यो न भर्ता ।
न जाया न विद्या न वृत्तिर्ममैव
गतिस्त्वं गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥१॥Na Taato Na Maataa Na Bandhur-Na Daataa
Na Putro Na Putrii Na Bhrtyo Na Bhartaa |
Na Jaayaa Na Vidyaa Na Vrttir-Mama-Iva
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||1||
Neither the Father, nor the Mother; Neither the Relation and Friend, nor the Donor,
Neither the Son, nor the Daughter; Neither the Servant, nor the Husband,
Neither the Wife, nor the (worldly) Knowledge; Neither my Profession,
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
भवाब्धावपारे महादुःखभीरु
पपात प्रकामी प्रलोभी प्रमत्तः ।
कुसंसारपाशप्रबद्धः सदाहं
गतिस्त्वं गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥२॥Bhavaabdhaav-Apaare Mahaa-Duhkha-Bhiiru
Pa-Paata Pra-Kaamii Pra-Lobhii Pra-Mattah |
Ku-Samsaara-Paasha-Pra-Baddhah Sada-[A]ham
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||2||
In this Ocean of Worldly Existence which is Endless, I am full of Sorrow and Very much Afraid,
I have Fallen with Excessive Desires and Greed, Drunken and Intoxicated,
Always Tied in the Bondage of this miserable Samsara (worldly existence),
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
न जानामि दानं न च ध्यानयोगं
न जानामि तन्त्रं न च स्तोत्रमन्त्रम् ।
न जानामि पूजां न च न्यासयोगं
गतिस्त्वं गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥३॥Na Jaanaami Daanam Na Ca Dhyaana-Yogam
Na Jaanaami Tantram Na Ca Stotra-Mantram |
Na Jaanaami Puujaam Na Ca Nyaasa-Yogam
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||3||
Neither do I know Charity, nor Meditation and Yoga,
Neither do I know the practice of Tantra, nor Hymns and Prayers,
Neither do I know Worship, nor dedication to Yoga,
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
न जानामि पुण्यं न जानामि तीर्थ
न जानामि मुक्तिं लयं वा कदाचित् ।
न जानामि भक्तिं व्रतं वापि मातर्गतिस्त्वं
गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥४॥Na Jaanaami Punnyam Na Jaanaami Tiirtha
Na Jaanaami Muktim Layam Vaa Kadaacit |
Na Jaanaami Bhaktim Vratam Vaapi Maatar-Gatis-Tvam
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||4||
Neither do I Know Virtuous Deeds, nor Pilgrimage,
I do not know the way to Liberation, and with little Concentration and Absorption,
I know neither Devotion, nor Religious Vows; Nevertheless Oh Mother,
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
कुकर्मी कुसङ्गी कुबुद्धिः कुदासः
कुलाचारहीनः कदाचारलीनः ।
कुदृष्टिः कुवाक्यप्रबन्धः सदाहं
गतिस्त्वं गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥५॥Ku-Karmii Ku-Sanggii Ku-Buddhih Kudaasah
Kula-[Aa]caara-Hiinah Kadaacaara-Liinah |
Ku-Drssttih Ku-Vaakya-Prabandhah Sada-[A]ham
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||5||
I performed Bad Deeds, associated with Bad Company, cherished Bad Thoughts, have been a Bad Servant,
I did not perform my Traditional Duties, deeply engaged in Bad Conducts,
My eyes Saw with Bad Intentions, tongue always Spoke Bad Words,
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
प्रजेशं रमेशं महेशं सुरेशं
दिनेशं निशीथेश्वरं वा कदाचित् ।
न जानामि चान्यत् सदाहं शरण्ये
गतिस्त्वं गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥६॥Praje[a-Is]sham Rame[a-Is]sham Mahe[a-Is]sham Sure[a-Is]sham
Dine[a-Is]sham Nishiitha-Ishvaram Vaa Kadaacit |
Na Jaanaami Caanyat Sada-[A]ham Sharannye
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||6||
Little do I know about The Lord of Creation (Brahma), The Lord of Ramaa (Goddess Lakshmi) (Vishnu), The Great Lord (Shiva), The Lord of the Devas (Indra),
The Lord of the Day (Surya) or The Lord of the Night (Chandra),
I do not know about other gods, but always seeking Your Refuge,
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
विवादे विषादे प्रमादे प्रवासे
जले चानले पर्वते शत्रुमध्ये ।
अरण्ये शरण्ये सदा मां प्रपाहि
गतिस्त्वं गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥७॥Vivaade Vissaade Pramaade Pravaase
Jale Ca-[A]nale Parvate Shatru-Madhye |
Arannye Sharannye Sadaa Maam Prapaahi
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||7||
During Dispute and Quarrel, during Despair and Dejection, during Intoxication and Insanity, in Foreign Land,
In Water, and Fire, in Mountains and Hills, amidst Enemies,
In Forest, please Protect me,
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
अनाथो दरिद्रो जरारोगयुक्तो
महाक्षीणदीनः सदा जाड्यवक्त्रः ।
विपत्तौ प्रविष्टः प्रनष्टः सदाहं
गतिस्त्वं गतिस्त्वं त्वमेका भवानि ॥८॥Anaatho Daridro Jaraa-Roga-Yukto
Mahaa-Kssiinna-Diinah Sadaa Jaaddya-Vaktrah |
Vipattau Pravissttah Pranassttah Sadaaham
Gatis-Tvam Gatis-Tvam Tvam-Ekaa Bhavaani ||8||
I am Helpless, Poor, Afflicted by Old Age and Disease,
Very Weak and Miserable, always with a Pale Countenance,
Fallen Asunder, Always surrounded by and Lost in Troubles and Miseries,
You are my Refuge, You Alone are my Refuge, Oh Mother Bhavani.
http://www.greenmesg.org/mantras_slokas/devi_bhavani-bhavani_ashtakam.php
